What the heck?

Who are you and what are you doing in my inbox?!!!

Hi. Welcome to my newsletter (heavy on the new). If you’ve ever signed up for one of my writing workshops, bought a Crying is Cool shirt off my website, or taken one of my Harry Potter tarot quizzes, you got added to my email list automatically. Your inbox is a sacred space and I hope you’ll consider keeping me around!

You have two options:
1.) Do nothing and you’ll receive my new blog posts every so often.
2.) Unsubscribe and check in on my blog the old fashioned way: by clicking this link.

Unsubscribing does mean you’ll be missing out on really great, probably too personal stuff to read on the toilet or during the peaceful time between getting home from work and actually getting out of your car. So choose carefully.

If we haven’t been properly introduced, my name is Christina Wolfgram. I’m a comedian and writer. It used to be my job to make viral Facebook videos, so maybe your aunt has tagged you in a post of me spitting wine at some point.

I have a confession to make:
I miss old internet.

Before views and likes and thumbnails, I blogged. When I went to high school, I blogged for my friends from middle school. When I went to college, I blogged for my friends from high school. I created new blog accounts for when I moved to England, for when I moved to D.C., for when I moved to LA. Xanga, Livejournal, Blogspot - the freedom to write whatever I wanted was intoxicating.

About a decade ago, I started a blog called Sporknotes, where I got drunk and explained the plots to my favorite movies and books (my brother transcribing for me). It only had one post and it was about Black Swan. But Sporknotes! The potential!!

After years of formatting my opening paragraphs to fit SEO requirements (short sentences! keywords! relevant links!) and editing videos down to 60 seconds or less, I want the freedom back.

I want that old internet feeling.

And you deserve a little old internet, too.

Here at The Sob Blog (do we like that name? is it “on brand” enough?), we will not be inventing any stupid holidays, like National Bread Week or International Guinea Pig Day. Even though those both sound fun. No clickbait. No hashtags.

This will be a space for stories, working shit out, and oversharing. Pretend you’re my friend from middle school and we are on AIM. Except hopefully my spelling is better and I’ll be doing a LoT LeSs oF tHiiS*~!

Thank you for reading. Hope I’ll see you soon.
Love Always,
Christina